Saturday, 4 October 2014

Was Michelangelo Gay?

I recently stumbled over a picture on Facebook that made me want to do a little research.

If Michelangelo was gay then it would provide endless amusement to me just thinking of various homophobic Christians worshipping a picture created by a homosexual! Well let's explore this claim a bit.

Who's that holy man?
We know the picture is meant to be Jesus but the fact it's a good looking white guy makes me skeptical.
There are of course many pictures of Jesus that have fed the mental image of some beautiful blue eyed chick magnet carpenter, but it doesn't really take a rocket scientist to work out Jesus wouldn't look like that.

Church Deception and More Yaoi

Leonardo Da Vinci was close friends with Ceasar Borgia, the man who's father later becomes Pope Alexander VI. So close in fact they were believed to be lovers (I'm starting to see a trend). His father commissioned Leonardo to make a painting of Jesus using dear old Ceasar as the model. Ceasar wasn't exactly known for being a prude, other than Leonardo it would seem he also slept with his sister (not to mention killed his brother). So the face of Jesus in Leonardo's paintings was a handsome bisexual, incestuous murderer.

On a side note, it would seem that during the Renaissance there was a contest between Leonardo and Michelangelo to paint particular battles. It's very interesting reading so I put a some stuff in the sources for you.

Anyway back to Michelangelo, in contrast to Leonardo he definitely sounds a bit... well 'eww', known for wearing dogskins for a lengthy period of time till his skin peeled off when he took them off (excuse me while I vomit into my handbag). That aside it's clear to say he had talent but the question we want to answer is was he gay?
It is true that Michelangelo asked for male models where female ones would have made sense, it's sometimes hard to distinguish males and females in his work too. His work 'ignudi' (depicting 20 naked youths covered with oak leaves and acorns to resemble penises) would be enough for me to question if this guy preferred the other white meat (if you know what I mean).
That isn't really evidence though (I mean rule 34 and all), so what else would suggest he was gay? Well one thing I would like to say is that he didn't seem to rate women very highly at all, not even highly enough to learn how to draw a breast that didn't like a guy with two scoops of ice cream on his chest. Look at any piece where he drew a woman and find those hideously deformed breasts. I'm sorry but I refuse to believe that he was incapable of drawing good boobs after everything else being so amazing. In my mind I see it as he was either so disinterested in women he didn't know what he was meant to find attractive and just drew a man and slap some ice cream scoops on (then stood back and said to himself: seems legit) or he deliberately made women look grotesque.

Apparently there is a sonnet in which he says that the highest form of love cannot be for a woman, because a woman "is not worthy of a wise and virile heart.", unfortunately I can only find references to it and not the whole thing, I assume it must be in Italian. After looking at his work,fl_progressive,q_80,w_320/18k2lefgd9flwpng.jpg

I think he was probably gay but we have no proof and I'm not religious so I'm not going to start saying because it's written down it must be true.

If you have any additional information agreeing or disagreeing feel free to thrust it in my general direction and maybe we will eventually find some concrete evidence.
All that said, it doesn't really matter because either way Michelangelo was fabulous.

Sources for More Interest

Renaissance Rivals: Michelangelo, Leonardo, Raphael. Titian, by Rona Goffen
Published by Yale University Press
Copyright: 2002
ISBN: 0-300-09434-5-5